Saturday, 10 September 2011

Best laid plans of......but hopefully this will make you smile

I needed to go back to mum again and, not sure how long I would be there, I managed to prise the computer off of him with the intention off sorting out all the photos and catching the blog up whilst I was there. Sadly I carted it all the way there and back and couldn't use it because the dongle doobery thingamabob kept looking for the HP sauce bottle on the roof - ok so I'm not very technical but our thingy on the roof has an HP sauce bottle over it and the dongle seemed to be pining for it. Anyway, enough whinging, whilst there I came across this ditty. It was signed anon so, hopefully I'm not infringing anyone's copyright. I hope it brings a smile to the faces of those who, like me, are of a certain age.

It's the Sunday tea dance and they'll all be here today,
Aches and pains forgotten, dance the afternoon away.
Foxtrots, quicksteps, waltzes,some are slow but some still nifty, with memories of how it was back in 1950.
Norman's in the toilet and he's struggling to pee
He's got trouble with his prostate and he'll likely miss his tea.
Eddy's got a new love that he met in Thornton Heath,
She does a lovely tango but she hasn't any teeth.
His latest fancy footwork nearly broke his partner's neck,
She mistook his outside swivel for a contra travelling check.
Ida's had her hair done and she's ready for the saunter
But she had a vindaloo last night and it's coming back to haunt her.
Florry's miniskirt's revealing when she's spinning in the jive-she really shouldn't wear a thong approaching 85.
They've had their tea and cake and chat and had a little laugh
And gamely rise with creaking knees to face the second half.
Norman's made it back in time for rumba number one,
his cucaracha's very neat, but he's left his flies undone.
Vera's fallen over in a massive crimplene heap
Bert's got indigestion and Mabel's fast asleep.

It's last waltz time and up they get for Humperdinck's old tune
And then goodbye, good luck, take care
God willing see you soon.

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